the thankful thursday post that I accidentally deleted

i wrote a long blog post for thankful thursday...  anddddddddddddddd then I accidentally deleted it... i was not going to try to replicate it, but its sticking with me....

i was discharged last night after 9 days in the hospital...the last few days were incredibly emotional.. and there is not an iota of prednisone in my system... hmmm...so this emotional me... it's a grateful emotional... it's a present and true emotional...it's just what is right now..

while in the hospital i wept...
-for the Sharpe's who, after a seemingly no glitched IVF process ARE PREGNANT... these amazing folks who give so much to this world have had god answer their prayers...

- for Sarah Jones who, after 32 painful Thursday's registered Conner's Angels great strides team ... I cried so many tears for what that must have been like... id love to get on a plane and walk that walk beside that family

- for Vertex trials who show amazing results for a rarer CF mutation,

- for the easing burden of having an RT give me pt, hand me prefilled nebs... nurses that set up antbiotics around the clock so i don't have to... for the doctors that just wanted to run a few tests that enabled the diagnosis of an automonic disorder that results in some tachycardia

-for josh who checked in just about every day because he cares

-for sara who has proven to be a miracle of miracles--- who lives... this woman lives

-for my family...Nitza, Ale, Mom, Tom, gram,Erin, Judy... who drove hundreds of miles to come and see me.. bring flavor blasted goldfish, dinners, play card games...

i am a part of this community... the CF community... the people that are there.. that rally... that pray... that care... that i will never meet, but think of each day... they are the front lines against this disease.. we stand in solidarity against a genetic mutation that has taken the lives of those we love... that adds hours of treatments to our days and months of intravenous anti-biotics to our years... that decreases lung function and for the grace of god raises it again... these people are the strongest people i know... the most beautiful...the men and women and children who know what it means to pray and hope against hope.... I am honored to be counted among them... honored..

So this is a not so well written replication of what I wrote and deleted....

Last night I came home and cried and cried and cried... and I've now been awake since 5am... no more tears and have walked my puppy, made some coffee... watched the CF episode of Grey's Anatomy online.. you know because I have CF.. it was about CF... and I'm ready to slowly embrace a day... filling my own neb cups... starting my own IV's... making my own meals... and I'm happy...that the army is behind me... that the cutest little boy is asleep soundly in his bed... that i have this life... and that its mine... and that i have met online in the last 2 years some of the most amazing people I believe i'll ever know...

Thankful thursday... on friday.... but sometimes it just rolls that way...